Enneagram 7 Profile

I’ve seen firsthand how the Enneagram has influenced my therapy practice, my clients, and my own personal growth. In order to better understand its impact, I interviewed a representative of each number to see the world through their lens.

What do you love the most about your number?

It is FUN to be a seven. The world is always offering new and exciting adventures to which you need only say, “YES! Let’s do it!” Adventure is around every corner. From the grocery store and Target (swoon!) to the daily drive to and from all the places you go. You just have to look up and around to see what is waiting for you.

What is the hardest thing about your number?

See above :) While the adventure and excitement and fun is SO GREAT, it can also be the very thing that keeps you from being present and actually feeling life. The frantic and consistent effort to avoid that which is painful is so effortless that you can easily go through a day only “experiencing” good things. The truth for 7s can often be that we have become master escape artists, fooling even ourselves into thinking we’re fully and completely experiencing life: the good, the challenging, the exciting, the painful, and everything in between. The realization of this is slow and can be so heavy.

How have you used the knowledge of your Enneagram number to grow toward your best self?

Learning the lessons above has allowed me to understand my absolute need to be still. It has allowed me to understand that I have been avoiding my feelings, having very little awareness of their presence in my body. So now, I take breaks throughout the day to truly just sit and be still. To feel. Noticing, even as I’ve answered these questions, times I need to slow down, take my hands away from the keyboard, and notice. That’s it. Period. Just notice. I’ve learned that I really don’t need to make sense of what my feelings in my body are trying to communicate. Words come easily. Sitting with feelings does not.

How has the Enneagram been useful to you during the therapy process?

In my own therapy, it has been useful (and honestly kind of terrible) that my therapist is also a 7. So while it can be so great to be seen, to be seen while you are learning to be still in the presence of someone who truly gets it? That’s some special kind of power. I’ve chosen to feel even feelings around that and it’s been hard but so rewarding.

In my role as therapist, it’s been wild to learn two things:

1. It is an incredible gift to be able to make sense in my head of the feelings others have without judgement. To connect my own woundedness and humanity to their woundedness and humanity is a gift I hold very dear. And one I continually work to grow in. It has allowed me to hold space for them in a way others cannot because of history, emotional investment, etc (all the reasons we can’t offer therapy to our family and friends). I do not take this for granted. 

2. I’m starting to see what it will mean for me and for my clients when I’m not only able to do #1 but also able to feel in my body what is coming up for me as they share what is coming up for them. It’s a connection from our true personhood. Currently in the process of learning this one...

What advice would you give to other people of your same number?

Go to therapy with someone who gets it and won’t let you escape feelings. You won’t love them all the time but you need them. 

Sit. Be still. Sit in the dark. As little sound as possible around you (all parents feel free to roll your eyes and say, “I don’t know what kind of world you live in but quiet doesn’t exist in mine!) —-a note on that. You’ll be surprised where you find opportunities for silence/stillness. The pull towards everything BUT silence caused me to believe it didn’t exist. It might truly not exist in your life. I absolutely know that I have the privilege to find quiet. I pray you will find yours, too. 

Notice what you feel in your body. Focus on your hands, what sensations do you feel? Notice your neck. What is going on there? Don’t try to make sense of it in your head. No need for words initially. Just notice.